I’ve been in a good place lately. It sounds weird but I have to say it’s just not that ‘exciting’. It’s boring. I don’t have much to write about. I haven’t had any reason to write in a while. I’m in this weird, blurry, content state of indifference. Stable. A down-to-earth, “dumb” state of ‘happiness’. I don’t really have anything to complain about. Passion? I’m not passionate anymore. What’s fucked up is that I don’t care that I don’t care that I’m not passionate anymore. Maybe I was never passionate in the first place. Maybe all these years my pretentiousness & ego got the best of me and blinded me from what I really am: a Businessman. Sometimes my pompous, irrational ego gets the best of me and I think of myself as this suffering artist with all this passion. He’s so passionate about what he does! You’re so passionate! I dunno, at this point, for some reason, I just. don’t. fucking. care. and I’m fine with that.
I’m gonna keep vlogging my wonderful, “depressing” life. We’re gonna keep doing the “boring” interviews. I’m gonna stay on my medication and stay consistent. I’ll get married around 32-36. Have a couple kids. Die around 70-80 years old. and That’s it. I don’t wanna be a star. I just wanna be normal. Fuck perfection. Fuck “greatness”. I’m over it.
Also, I’m gonna wake up tomorrow and have a completely new, opposite paradigm.
Thanks for reading,
Los Angeles, CA