Work

I can’t think. I’m sitting here waiting for inspiration. It’s been 30 minutes now. I guess this is work. I’m doing it. I’m in the thick of it. I’m reading through all my notes and I’m not laughing. Nothing seems funny or interesting to me. It’s annoying. I don’t know what to do. I’m trying to write a web series but I can’t. I guess this is what I’ve been scared of for so long. It’s actually pretty uncomfortable. I just need to keep staring at the screen. Keep sitting here. I was reading a self-help book before this when I suddenly, mysteriously thought, this is a distraction. I’m never going to feel ready. Do it now. So here I am. I’m just waiting here. I guess I’m distracting myself writing down this blog post right now. It’s making me feel a little better. Not really though, this is all fluff. Does Louis C.K. experience this when he writes his sketches? Probably. I hope so. I’m just gonna keep doing this. It’s not fun. I don’t like it. But I wanna do it. This is work. This is exercise. I’m doing it. I’m writing. The same as doing push-ups. I did 40 push-ups today. It wasn’t comfortable. It wasn’t fun. I was glad I did it though. I now get to live with the knowledge of having done the pushups. That’s the reward. Stronger muscles and a better looking body is nice but the real reward is the knowledge that I consciously chose to put forth effort into something. It’s a mental reward. That’s what I’m doing now. I’m working. I’m waiting. I’m writing. This is work. Do the work. Ok, glad I could get that out of my system, back to sitting and waiting. Back to working.

Thanks for Reading,

Andrew Hales

3:55am

Bountiful, Utah

10 thoughts on “Work”

  1. I get overwhelmed by possibility. Playing music, making films, writing. The possibility get’s me excited, and I’ll start to focus more on the idea of it and stop focusing on the actual thing step by next painstaking step.

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  5. Now you’re talking Andrew

    ‘to live with the knowledge of having done the pushups. That’s the reward.’

    Spot on

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  8. Louis speaks about George with the highest regard, and credits him with changing his career on the brink of quitting. Sometimes you need to just figure out what really matters to you, in order to figure out who you are, before you can begin your life as that person.

    Although crude, he has a point.

    I’ve followed all of your content since 2012, because I believe in the person you are; and will continue to grow into. My advice if you want some results: cut out the bullshit, all of it. Wake up and work, not working well? Change something, and work. Write constantly, create exclusively instead of observing and creating. Your content wil become genuine to what you really want.

    Best,
    from a friend.

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  9. I’m a very creative person, I have lots of ideas, yet something always holds me back from delving into them. It’s an incredibly hard process getting them from your brain to paper, it shouldn’t be, but it is. I have anxiety issues myself, so there’s possibly a lack of confidence that the ideas aren’t good enough, maybe I convince myself they are not, so I find a distraction to suppress the guilt of not believing in myself. I’m only letting myself down, I need someone to be accountable to because I hate to let others down. When I’ve had someone to be accountable to, I find I’m not as critical of my ideas or find the inspiration comes a bit easier. I guess the hard part is to find someone who you trust enough to be accountable to. Good luck mate.

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